One thing at a time!

​'Mama milk, mama milk, mama milk' cries one sweetheart, while the other cries because he wants to be cuddled to sleep. My nerves are frazzled on 4 hours sleep, and the noise and needs of two babas at the same time becomes overwhelming, until I say to myself 'One thing at a time, just one thing at a time'.

The reality is I cannot give them both what they need at the same time, as much as I would love to, and in the back of my mind, the voice of 'I can't' triggers feelings that disturb my peace and leave me feeling that I can't cope.

The deeper truth is that these are just words that have temporarily claimed power over me, just words. The deeper truth is that I can cope, and I can care for both of my babies  pretty well as long as I put my focus on 'One things at a time', 'I can do one thing at a time', I remind myself, because I can, but what I cannot do is be superwoman. 'One thing at a time' I echo, and with this mantra my peace is restored. 

What this looks like in the moment is first of all accepting that one of them is going to keep crying. I give one his 'mama milk' and those tears end, and the I offer the other one some too, for momentary distraction, until I can fully hold him in both arms and cuddle him to sleep. 

When one wants me to fix his train set, moments after he has mindfully taken the tracks apart, and the other is stuck on a half-rollover on his baby gym, the feeling of being torn between two wants triggers feelings that disturb my peace.  'One thing at a time' looks like, accepting the sounds of their cries, picking up the baby in my arms and walking over to fix the train tracks with the other hand. I cannot attend to both their needs at the same time, and its okay; they are okay.

The overwhelm of both children calling to me with their needs, and when this is further intensified by cries or shouts, is overwhelming when my reaction, my natural reaction, is to meet both their needs, or our own, in that very same moment. Saying 'I can do one thing at a time' overrides the automatic reaction that has me pulled in two or three directions, with rising anxiety, to calmly attend to one need or want at a time, and let everything else go; this is the path to peace.